Loss is a terrible feeling

"Weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning."
Psalm 30:5

I was living on a beautiful Island in Japan; moreover, while God was creating my oldest son in my womb, chaos began to form itself around me. I was about 12 weeks into my pregnancy, sitting on my couch when I got a horrible call from my brother telling me our father passed. I didn't believe him, I thought he was playing a terrible joke on me. Oh, the heaviness heart break causes...your unable to understand, your unable to wrap your head around that person being gone, your unable to catch your breath, unable to stand, to hear, to stop from crying. Loss is a terrible feeling. And while I was experiencing the best time in my life, I was experiencing the most terrible time in my life. I can only describe it...bitter sweet. I loved being pregnant, I hated the fact that I wasn't going to witness my father meet my son. My father had missed the most precious moments in my life and now he won't be a part of this either. I didn't understand. The funeral for me was very difficult and everyone kept saying, 'you have to take care of your baby'. Moreover, all I wanted to do was be angry and cry but I couldn't bring him back. He was gone. It's been three years now and it still feels like it was just yesterday. God took a huge part of my life but he also took my biggest burden. God released me from the burden of always worrying about dad. I began to realize and be content with the fact that God took my dad to HIS eternal bosom. God finally gave him his true victory, he's own freedom. Even though loss is a terrible feeling, REJOICING does come in the morning. God does take away that sadness. Don't get me wrong I still cry at the thought of dad's smile or his laugh but it's a different cry. It's a joyous cry. It's a cry followed by a victorious smile. My dear friend, don't allow to be over enveloped by your terrible feeling of loss. But allow the Holy Spirit to encompass your heart with a glimpse of His shining victory. The journey of loss is a roller coaster it never ends but instead of being a terrible ride let God bless you with the best ride of your life.